The blog
Writings on food, faith, creativity, and family, all with the goal of helping you nourish your soul.
Welcome to my little home on the Internet! If you were in my actual house, I’d offer you a drink and start raiding the pantry for snacks so we dive into the deep stuff (I’m not great at small talk). My internet home isn’t much different–there’s food to savor and words to mull over about everything from faith to creativity to family.
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When You Feel Like a Failure as a Mom
I have never felt so horrible as a parent.
We finished lunch, and I put a movie on my for twins in the basement while I gave my two-year-old a bath. He seemed to wear summer all over his body. As I wiped off the jelly, dirt, and sweat from my little boy, I heard a knock at the door. I thought it was Amazon or maybe a door-to-door salesperson, so I didn’t answer.
Another knock.
I stood up from kneeling in front of the bathtub and glanced out the window. A woman was heading back to her car, and then I quickly realized she was just going to grab something and come back. I checked on my son in the tub, then ran downstairs to open the door.
“Hello?” I called after her. “Can I help you?”
“I’m just going to grab my ID.”
Huh? I scrolled through my memories, trying to place this woman. Did I know her? Was I supposed to know what she was there for? Did I have an appointment I forgot about?
I stood at the door, confused. She walked right into my house, as if she had a right to be there.
“DCFS,” she said. I don’t even remember what she said next. Everything in my mind got fuzzy, and all I could think to say was, “Umm, I’ve got a kid in the tub. Can you give me a minute?”